Homesick

January 3rd 2011

Today I just felt emotional because of my aunt flow it just made it worse I'm guessing. I'm not exactly what you call a hot mess. But I'm not exactly in the most vibrant mood. Physically speaking I felt detached to the world sometimes, sometimes or actually all the time I feel like nobody listens sometimes. Like people don't give me undivided attention. No, I'm not an attention whore, I just don't like to speak and then no one will listen. That's why I'm pretty much mime most of the time. I'm serious, I've grown a lot quieter especially, especially when I moved here to the desert.

I'm really home sick and I can't help but just express myself and how I feel at the moment. I could be hanging out with Nishat right now... well not exactly right now but if we were to sleep over or something. I just miss being where I finally felt the most comfortable. It was back at home, Chicago. I don't know why anyone would even think of moving over here in the first place. Yeah I am thankful for what I have but the living environment I'm in right now I'm not so happy about, it makes me sound a bit selfish.

I just feel lost like I don't exactly have anywhere or anyone to really go to. I'm not going to lie but there are a lot of fake people out here. It's extremely irritating when I have to be around these certain people. I don't tend to make friends out here much because I'm really not open to anyone in Arizona. I think maybe in general I'm not, not as much as I use to be. Okay maybe just not people here in AZ. But if you're talking about a Midwesterner then I'm down.

I just had to let this out and about. Title: Homesick.

Oh yeah I don't title my blogs til the end now. I just want to get out everything that I wanted to before I title it anything.

I really wanted to talk about also adults and how some don't understand the generation and why they post everything that might be on their minds or what they're doing... have they ever checked the question it asked you before you post a status on facebook? mums and dads of various teenagers probably have failed to see the question " What are you thinking about? " or " What are you doing? "

Another really annoying thing I have encountered is this. I don't like how people underestimate me or already know my character quote on quote because of just looking at me. I don't know if I explained that right... I probably didn't but something along the lines of that I'm done blogging my brain needs some rest.

Til next time. I guess.