Dark&Light

No not the different contrast of light in various forms even though I learned that in photo class... emotionally speaking. & somewhat literal. Phases in your life you go through grief trial and pain. Things that will hurt you. Scar you. I refer to this note written by my friend Mat & I.


"We will live with a pain in our hearts that will heal slowly but in time we will be left with a scar it will remind of us the times we've been hurt and it in turn makes a valuable lesson." Part One by Claire Yu.

"Its a lesson that will always be remembered but it comes with the price of a heavier heart. Which in time we'll get use to but things may never be the same again and that fact is what we must acknowledge." Part Two by Mathew McLaughlin


So basically Mat and I made this up as we talked. We were both going through difficult times in our lives.

But if there's darkness there is a light a light that shines bright that over powers the darkness and makes it somewhat inevitable that you will be happy again.

There are phases in life and we must fathom that it is our destiny to be alive, living, breathing as I speak. No one should change that, not even your self for surely you should feel ever so blessed to be given life at all.

If not then it is yet a curse and into the darkness again you fall. Wallowing in your self pity. Regretting your actions and pain will overwhelm you, drown you, until you have nothing left to live for.

Phases in life where you will live in happiness is surely a blessing. It allows you to feel the good things in life. For others it's difficult but non the less everyone comes to find happiness on occasions. It reminds me of this quote.


"To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer; to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be happy, one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness.” -Kyle Yabes... I think. lol.


Anyways on a more serious note. Life is a complicated matter. The concept of it, and then there's death, and there's love. All a part of being alive.

QOTD: Which is more complicated? Love or Life?




This picture represents me as in my opinion as a deep, strong, and living being. + It's pretty so I just wanted to put it up. :)

Quotes

Some are inside jokes, some are comedic, some are just plain serious, and others have a meaning behind them. These are some quotes that I keep I will add more I guess let you guys in on my knowledge and my favorite quotes. Hope you enjoy.


-"Make sure ur boob milk doesnt get into the swimming water so the consistency wont be thick." -A.J. Deguzman.



-"Thank you Ka Arnel! Excersise Yay!"- Claire Yu, Arnnie Deguzman, A.J. Deguzman.



-Joey: I'm fat!
Me: Maybe because you had those deep fried thai appetizers yesterday night!
Joey: So? Imma work it off!
Me: Well you need to eat more healthier!....
Me: I'm gonna shove vegetables down your throat!
Joey: Okay. Go ahead... Cause I'll LIKE IT!
Me: hahaha! LMAO!!! LOL!



-"I'm gonna shove it down my throat, and I'll savor..." -Joey Yu



My Weekday Mornings getting ready for school.
-*BEEP *BEEP *BEEP *BEEP *SMACK.
(Alarm clock and me smacking it to shut up.)

(My thoughts when I am waken by my alarm clock)
OKAY Claire! You need to wake up! Okay just take off the layers of blankets... *shivers EKK it's to malamig!!! No you need to take off the blankets... NOW!... But But But it's just so warm... *KNOCKS OUT! (Okay I know this isn't a quote but I wanted to put it here... cause it's my profile and I can do whatever I want with it! hmmp. LOL JK. ;p)



-LOL: Girl and Guy's Conversation

Guy: "I just had TBK."
Girl: "Ooo Yum."
Guy: "I'm still hungry and want more though!"
Girl: "Chubby Bunny wants more?"
Guy: "Lol yes and I want you!"
Girl: "Lol we can do what bunnies do... If you know what I mean. :) That's from a song too. lol.
Guy: "Rofl wth! What do they do?"
Girl: "They reproduce A LOT! Lol my nerdy way of saying that... Actually again it's just dorky... hehe.
Guy: "Rofl oh wow! You and your addiction to sex!"
Girl: "Hey I am merely a curious virgin not a sex addict."

^^^^ Loved loved loved this conversation. HAHA.


-SOO this little Jewi was observing a conversation between Jessica Alba and Hayden Pannettiere and this is what had happened:

Jewi: "Jessica finish your samosa!"
Jessica: "I'll finish is later."
Hayden: "Jessica... you're cute."
Jewi is right about to turn the corner...
Jessica: "Do I look like Boot to you?"

^^^^^ LMAO!!! (Boot = Our Mini Dachshund)


-Girlfriend: "Oww! My headphones are hurting me!

Boyfriend: "Aww!"

*Takes Headphones from gf and takes it to another room and beats it up, goes out the room with a smile*

Boyfriend: You okie babe? *hugs*

*smiles*

Girlfriend: *Smiles* I Love You!
♥ :)


-*Joey enters my room.
Joey: So just to make sure... Ashley's dad... his name is Tom right? So it's uncle Tom?
Me: It's John, so it would be uncle John, Joey... *looks at him like he's stupid.
Joey: SAME THING!!!
*Joey exits my room.
(Wow I love my brother. HAHA.)


-“When people walk away from you, let them go. Your destiny is never tied to anyone who leaves you, and it doesn’t mean they are bad people. It just means that their part in your story is over.” and so begins a new chapter... -unknown.



-"We will live with a pain in our hearts that will heal slowly but in time we will be left with a scar it will remind of us the times we've been hurt and it in turn makes a valuable lesson." Part One by Claire Yu.

"Its a lesson that will always be remembered but it comes with the price of a heavier heart. Which in time we'll get use to but things may never be the same again and that fact is what me must acknowledge." Part Two by Mathew McLaughlin

Love

June 6th, 2010

Oh yes love. Some think aww, some think ew, some think stupid. But others who have found love say it's like magic. It's almost like the greatest thing you can feel.

Others that went in love and got out horribly heart broken say it's something that you wouldn't want to try. But it's only the fact that they are afraid to getting hurt again, because of what they experience, like they can't find love again.

Love is such a mysterious thing. Some people mistaken it for lust but if you're smart enough you'll know which is which. Preferably I think that the younger you are it's hard to distinguish which is which. You want to believe it's love but in the end you find out it's lust. Your friends (especially older ones) kept telling you and now you just don't want to hear I told you so.

I think that true love can't be rushed. You just happen to trip over it and fall on your face. That's why they invented the phrase "Fall in Love".

Oh and the bloggers spark for this little note was the fact that I'm watching Sex in the City the movie right now. (Yeah I know)

The other is the fact that I'm seeing someone. Gosh thinking about him brings a smile to my face. That almost tickle-y feeling in your tummy. Yeah people say butterflies, but it's more subtle than that really. Like feathers not butterflies.

But love comes in all shapes and forms, an affection that can be shown to friends, family, dogs and cats, and hey even your hamster. Oh how could I ever forget the classical love for another? That one person that you become one with. When you're with them it feels like everything in this world is perfect. It's because they've become your world and you are no longer selfish but selfless.

I have to get back to the movie now. I hope you liked this. Oh and if you do like this note or comment, I'd like to get feedback, really I do. Thanks. Have a great day :)

-Claire

Visitors. Guests. And the Miscellaneous.

June 5th, 2010

And sometimes it's awkward, really it is. Somewhat I feel it's an invasion of privacy depending if I like the person or not. Well really I feel like it's invading personal space when people I don't like happen to find themselves in. There you go. Right now I'm just trying to enjoy a relaxing summer afternoon with little to no interruption. As is my brother who has guest over, his friends triggered me to write this blog. Not that I don't like them or anything.

Well anyways. When that unwelcome guest does something that you don't like it just adds the cherry on top. Really it does. And you constantly check the clock to see how many minutes remains or how long they've been there inside your house. But then again you have to be nice and as courteous as you possibly can, and you can think of it as killing that person with kindness. (Tyra Banks) If you catch my drift.

Oh and your beloved belongings don't you hate when they touch your things or criticize you for what you have? Oh dear it makes me want to pinch them. No not the cheeks in places where they wouldn't like to be pinched. (The crotch) Then they smirk at you for having such things lying around your house.

Well I think that covers what I've experienced.

Ugh this blog sucks arse.

Oh well.

-Claire :)

Supposedly Beyonce Knowles and Christina Aguilera know my life. HAHA.

May 31st, 2010

Using only song names from ONE ARTIST, cleverly answer these questions. Pass it on to 15 people you like and include me. You can't use the band I used. Try not to repeat a song title. It's a lot harder than you think! Repost as "My life according to (band name)"

Pick your Artist:
Beyonce Knowles

Are you a male or female:
If I were a boy

Describe yourself:
Beautiful

How do you feel:
Hurt

Describe where you currently live:
Satellites

If you could go anywhere, where would you go:
Disappear

Your favorite form of transportation:
Rollin' and Tumblin'

Your best friend is:
Ave Marie

You and your best friends are:
Diva

What's the weather like:
Check on it

Favorite time of day:
Dark is the night

If your life was a TV show, what would it be called:
Weary Blues

What is life to you:
Makes me wanna pray

Your relationship:
Dirty

Your fear:
Genie in a bottle

What is the best advice you have to give:
Our day will come

Thought for the Day:
Love will find a way

How I would like to die:
Smash into you

My soul's present condition:
Keeps getting better

My motto:
Just be free

Psychological Manipulation

May 21st, 2010

Yes, it's been done to a lot of people, heck it's been done to me. But the psychologic manipulation that I'm dawning on is the one that my boyfriend performed on me. It makes me curious as to how he does it.

Am I just gullible? or is he a really good actor? No, not even an actor more like one of those detectives you see on Criminal Minds (I love that show). As my finger throbs as I type out this curious case of mine. (I was trying to cut a lemon, but failed miserably as I cut into my thumb. :/) Anyways, what he does, I can't quiet get the gist of it.

Gist of it meaning, I'd like to perform such task. But I would never think of myself as a good enough actor or a manipulator to do such a thing. But then again I'm smart enough to fool my brother that the ketchup he was eating was blood. (Then again he was 5 years old...) The point is that I thought it was cool. Of course he used his manipulation skills for good and not for evil. (Which is something I have utter loath over from past experiences.)

Anyways my amazing bf was playing a little mind game with me causing me to feel sad and he acted as though he was really sad. But in truth he just wanted to see how I'd react to a certain situation he'd thought up. After a few days he confessed he was playing a mind game with me. (He's done it before to test me.) Usually I'd be alright with it, the fact that I'd just been somewhat lied and manipulated into thinking and believing what was going on. (Except when I'm on my ".") Yeah it sounds a bit like he's a bad person but no. It's simply a way of trying to get something out of me without doing something worse. (I guess?)

Point is I am curious and interested to learn how to do such a feat. That's all ;p Love my baby ko. <3

Have a great rest of the day. noon. night. (depending on which time zone you're in)

Risky

April 23rd, 2010

Do you ever get those moments where you feel like doing something risky or something crazy that normally you wouldn't do? Well at this moment for at least an hour now I feel like doing something that I might regret. I'm stopping myself cause I know it will be of relief. But then I know I will pay consequences at the end.

It's like when you're dog pees on your most favorite jeans and you can just imagine what you want to do to that "innocent" little puppy. (*ahem: strangle the heck out of it...) But there are other ways to handle the situation other than harming anyone or anything.

For starters take a deep breath, at this point you are on fire like literally, you just want to smack someone where no one wants to get smacked. Right?! Yeah, real hard to keep your hands from making like a fly swatter but try sitting on your hands or screaming in a pillow then take deep breaths.

Then you'd want to distract yourself or rant about it to release how you feel.

You should be fine, but if you still have that urge just eat some ice cream or a fruit popsicle. (Real fruit popsicles are healthier and may I suggest Breyer's Strawberry Popsicle. mmm. nummy.)

Well anyways I hope this helps. If you have any other questions or want some more tips about this or etc. Write on my wall message me or w.e. :)

Have a great day.

<3 -Claire

Friends and Personality

So today is april 2nd of the year 2010. I have come to a realization... (or more like Jacky pointing out) that I am becoming like the people I hang out with... Yes it is both good and bad... but I really was surprised and shocked to hear this. So I was hanging out with Jacky yesterday at her place, we were talking then all of a sudden... Me: I haven't changed! Jacky: Oh yes you have! Me: WHAT? Jacky: You act more like me and Sierra now, and you've lost your accent Me: WHAT REALLY?! (still in shock) Jacky: YEAH!

So yes I was shocked I didn't want to believe it at first like as if I'd contracted cancer or if I had just found out I was pregnant. But seriously it's not that bad as I thought. Everyone does it. No matter what you do sometimes you just can't help but act like you're friends...

Yeah so my ideal purpose is to be myself and my own person. At the same time try not to be isolated? Do you know what I mean? But I find myself getting noticed doing the most random and things I know that I wouldn't do normally...

I'VE LOST MY ACCENT?! I USE TO TALK LIKE J.B.?! LOL. seriously I find that I talk like myself still... okay wait.... omg... when I'm around them I do talk like them... wtf?! anyways... yes my accent. My chicago accent I loved and have wanted to keep... but it's gone? :(

So really now I would like to make a vow... to be myself... even if I'm with my friends. I don't like not being myself. I've just became immune to the feeling of what I like and don't like. I'm my own person and I shouldn't make other people decide on what I am even if it is my friends that I hang out with.

Yes I've realized I can have fun with people without changing who I am. My arms and hands hurt from straining myself from all this typing it's quiet strange really... No it's not strange I'm strange. <- HARHARHAR.

LOL. anyways. Be true to yourself. Be yourself. Hang with friends and still be yourself-ish?
um well... you can't really keep yourself from acting like your friends it just happens. Just don't go all carbon copy now. catch yourself before it becomes carbon copy.

Have a great day.

Indecent People

March 17th, 2010

Indecent people. Those people that make you want to smack them in the face or beat them until they’re convinced that they need to change. Hatred? No just utter pity for how they’ve chosen to dealt with they’re lives, affecting the people, those around them. They’re blinded by their mindset. The type of mindset that makes them feel like what they’re doing is right. But when people examine the very fibers you are made of that is you and is showing by words that are coming out of your mouth, you are to confront the criticism and the corrections that people offer to give you. They pity you that you are unknowledgeable about who you are and what you’re doing. You may say things that you think is the most reasonable, but in truth, it is nothing but a worthless piece of dirt flying out of each corner of that hole on that thing that’s on top of your shoulders. Let’s face it. No you face it. Face the fact that YOU need to change in more than a hand full of things and more than a list could hold.

When you look at this paragraph. You would probably say, “Hey, what wrong Claire? Did someone piss you off?” But no, that’s not the case. This goes to everyone I guess… the truth that we have to live with. Yes some people deny the fact that we are not perfect and all around us has flaws. It takes a good-hearted person using his/her brain to really get to the bottom of this. I’m not saying that I am good-hearted. Knowledgeable is all I am. Really. I think it takes courage and support to really change yourself for the better of yourself and those around you. It matures you and strengthens as you inbound on this task. Those who are criticizing you have their own flaws too, the truth they give you may hurt. But let that criticism help you to change. Yeah?

Mind you I am just rambling. I ramble to get rid of emotion and physical strains of every day living. Most of the things I write about do imply to certain people places and things. Doesn’t mean I’m hating I just have to let out my feelings. I do not intend to offend anyone. If I do intend to offend anyone I will surely make that crystal CLEAR.

Thanks for reading this. ☺
Have a nice day.
Claire Yu

Kleenex

February 5th, 2010

So it's a wednesday night we went out on our way to church. We stopped by Home Depot so my uncle could go get some copies of some keys. While my uncle was waiting for the keys to be copied my mom wasn't feeling well her stomach is acidic and she was hungry. To top that off she was experiencing a very annoying cold that caused her to have a RUNNY NOSE. To make matters worse? We couldn't find any KLEENEX in the car.

My mom gave me $5 to go and get some Kleenex. You know what sucked for me? I was in heels and in church clothes. So I looked really really formal and in heels looking for Kleenex in a Wal-mart. I mean I've done it before it's just... Arizona ppl are weird especially the white people. (haha JK!) You just get a lot of stares, some real intense stares too.

Anyways since Joey came along with me I struggled to actually get myself to Wal-mart. (Me + Heels = Fail @ WALKING! ) When we finally reached inside we were greeted with the usual "Hello there, Welcome to Wal-mart!" by the greeters who are usually in their "Senior Age". (If you catch my drift.) As I "tip-toed" to the facial tissue aisle my feet were hurting and the people watching. Then I gave up and asked Joey to run and get the Kleenex, I stopped to rest right by a cart full of General Mills cereal.

We then paid for the Kleenex. It was $3.00-something. We rushed to the car! I remember I can run in heels... but risked looking like a retarded, formally dressed young lady.(Ironically I can run in heels but not walk well in them? haha crazy but true...) But I didn't care at the moment we were trying to keep my mom's nose from being:

A.) Being "slurped" up her nose again and again.

Or B.) Dripping and Dripping until there's a small pond inside the car.... a pond of mucus... (EW!)

We were waved by my uncle who was trying to help us find the car. (But the car was parked near the building idk why he waved anyways.) When we got into the car, our mother announced that she was hungry... So we went to a pho restaurant where my brother and I shared dinners, and my mom and my uncle had pho soup.

When we finished our dinner we got back inside the car. Our mom once again pulled out the box of kleenex.

Then she says. "Why did you guys buy the small box?"

Me: "Well your just gonna use it for now cause of the current condition of your nose mom." (OMG yeah I know I talk nerdy to mi madre too... that's how nerdy I am...)

Joey: "Yeah and plus you have Kleenex at home mom, remember?"

Mom: "Yeah..."

Joey and I together: "Yeah..."

Mom: "But you know guys I wanted the big box."

Joey and I together: "Yeah..."

Mom: "You know I like everything BIG."

JOEY AND I: "LMAO HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

Me still laughing while saying this: "You know mom... hahaha... you could still use hhahahah this LITTLE box in the hahahahhahha car!"

Joey: "Yeah for the hahhahhahah car!"

LMAO!!! so you see this is why it's worth having to deal with my mom cause she's funny without knowing it!!! HAAHAHAHAHAHAHA. JK I love my mother she's my everything. <3

Well I hope you guys enjoyed this little story. I know the intro is kind of boring but it ends up to be a good story ya know to lead up to the climax. Yeah I know me and joey were just thinking wrong at the time. But WHO DOESN'T??!?!?

Thanks for reading, please leave a comment to let me know what you think? yeah?

Calling you out.

January 3rd, 2010

Sleeping early. Dang. Way too much crap going around... This one goes out to you * baby girl.

* I called you this in the last message I sent you ; )

So BOY, you need to stop talking and talking cause what's the real point of doing it? Does it make sense to ruin someone's rep and ruining your own in the process? I mean forreal, GET OVER IT AND OVER YOURSELF. Cause what your doing is stupid, pathetic, and pointless. So go and screw yourself, you'd be better off doing that anyways than wasting your time doing what your doing with your mouth. AKA talking shiz. WORD.

Other people if your reading this DON'T, I repeat DON'T listen to all the rumors you hear it may or may not be true. You need to get to know the real facts and story before you assume things and believe the rumors. That's why their called rumors.

Or a better thing to do is just mind your own business cause what's gonna come out of spreading rumors? or talking about that stuff? Your just wasting time.

okay imma quit rambling. and good night. Baby girl I hope this DOES give you a satisfaction. and please tell me if this was too much. :D hehe. I lub you. <3

Blah Blah Blah

December 16th 2009

Random Vlogging.

So much has gone on since I’ve migrated myself and my family to Arizona.

+ I never knew I had an accent... like you know like a chicago accent or midwestern accent.
Only here in Arizona has somebody pointed that out. LOL.

+ I actually miss the snow. :)

+ It really never gets below 40 degrees here. : /

+ First time I've slept in complete darkness.

+ I can't believe I actually met a filipino here. ( JACKY GALAN!!! :D )

+ Joey and I have gotten a heck of a lot closer.

+ Everything here is so far. Even the walk to my own bus stop.

+ My piano have gotten better.

+ HAHA and so has my singing. :D

+ It's been 5 months! <3 ( Te Quiero Mucho- I Love You, Babe )

+ I actually got tan here... until I started to wear jeans again. haha. I never actually got dark in the last 6 years or so... not even in the summer in Illinois. GOSH. ;p

+ I still have my old fat as heck HAMSTER. gosh 3 years! :O haha. <3 him to death even if he does sometimes disturbs me in my sleep just running on his wheel.

+ I now am the official CHEF of the family. Seriously I cook like every night now. haha. And I actually LOVE this "CHORE" which was not asked to be done but I do it anyways. ;p

+ Well some things haven't changed like that fact that I'm one of the smartest people in my school... yeah not to brag or anything or to be conceited. 8)

+ I <3 ART. :D

+ My DOGS are A LOT happier. :D

But you know what? I miss Illinois. I still enjoyed all the 8 years I lived there. I want to go back and reminisce all the memories. Every time I recall something that was cherished in my memories I can't help but shed a tear or two.

But you know what, life goes on. I'm still living, I still have my family, I still have my old friends in Illinois even though I don't get to see them so much now. I have new friends I made. :) I still have a roof over my head. And most importantly I still have GOD.

When I attempted to walk to school

On the date of September 29th 2009 I attempted to walk to school.

Earlier in the morning I woke up at 6:30 Am. ARGH! I overslept causing me to rush and try to get things done as quickly as possible. I burned my forehead with my straightener in the process. I didn't get to eat breakfast. Also I forgot to fix my bed. I left the house like 7:25-7:30 Am. I walked my regular pace which made even more late. So when I arrived at my bus stop my bus passed right by me and didn't stop. Yes it sucked!

So I end up saying bye to my brother then I walk my butt back home hoping to catch a ride from my folks. Walking back home, people gave me the why-are-you-walking-back?-aren't-you-suppose-to-be-headed-to-school? stare. I felt like I've failed miserably.

So I finally arrive from my total of 30 minutes of waisted energy attempting to catch the bus. Oh joy. right? lol. So I waited there hoping for a sign of relief. As I waited I finally got a chance to eat breakfast, fix my bed, and even finish my lanyard. As I waited for about 45 minutes to an hour I thought to myself... "Should I just skip school?" "But I have stuff to do!" "Urgh!!!" "What to do?!"

When I realized nobody was coming probably because my mom was at work. I decided to walk to school. As I started off my walk I thought to myself, "Wow what am I doing?." "I could be kidnapped or raped for all I know!". As I watched the cars pass by I wished one would stop and ask, "Hey do you need a ride?" Well I mean I wouldn't just get into anybody's car. I just had that thought.

So 1 mile later of vigorous fast walking/sweating my butt off... My wish came true! Only thing was it wasn't what I expected... I cop car... Yes I real live cop who was driving I real cop car stopped right before the big mountainous hill. I thought I was hallucinating or seeing a mirage or something. But no, it was for real because he managed to slowly drive behind me like as if I was a car and he was tailgating me.

So I stopped in my tracks and turned and talk to the cop. He was tall and looked like he was around his 30's with light brown hair and seemed like he was half white half mexican. He asked me how I was and what in the world I was doing and where I was going. I told him I'm good and was walking to school. I got so scared.

Then he was like, Well school already started so I'll just give you a ride. So gladly I hopped into a car ignoring the fact that even if it was a cop I still shouldn't have gotten in. But I felt the cold crisp air conditioning of his car drag me inside. I was sweating and probably left like sweat on his passenger/criminal seat. lol but anyways I was too relieve yet scared at the same time to think about anything. I was relieved by the fact that this cop picked me up and I didn't have to walk all that 2 to 3 more miles to school. But I was scared about what he was gonna do with me like if I was gonna get into any trouble.

When we finally arrived into the driveway in front of the office. The cop and I got out of the car and walked into the office, I felt safer being in school. I walked up to the secretary ,D.J. and signed my name. She said, "Hey why are you late today? and I kindly explained to her what happened. She then had this expression like poor thing on her face. Lol which I thought was kind of cute. But anyways then she asked, "Is there anyone here to sign in for you?" So I glanced over to the cop that was just watching my every movement (creepy... lol jk!). Then he says yes I picked her up from the side of the street and I'm here to sign her in I guess. So he signed me in. Then D.J. gave me the pass. The cop left and I was on my way to 2nd period.

I was still sweating like crazy so I went to the bathroom and like tried to dry myself off and yeah that whole deal. Then I went to class with everyone staring at me like where the heck have you been? haha.

Yes so that's basically my morning... on tuesday since i"m writing about this today which is a thursday...